Yesterday, the choke was back. Obviously.
Yesterday, I read what Brent Riggs wrote on their family's blog as they go through the cancer of their daughter Abby. And then I read what MckMamma wrote about her latest tests on her unborn child with a heart condition.
Can I confess to having a really, really, cynical, ugly, awful thought?
I thought… “yeah, I used to write stuff like that… talk to me in three years.”
This post is in answer to that thought.
A thought that obviously came from the enemy of God.
A thought that the enemy of God really wants me to believe about my God.
That after three years of fighting for my marriage and family that my God has not and will not come through for me.
Brent Riggs, said this in his post, “It's been said that true courage is brave action despite fear. I would say the same principle applies to faith. Real faith, is the CHOICE to trust God despite circumstances that challenge faith. In light of that, I would say to you: Nope, not faking.”
MckMamma said this in her post, “And now, I will bring out the big guns. You see, as much of the Refiner's Fire as I have been going through lately, God's voice is still clearly calling out to me, saying, "Be patient child, I am not finished with you yet." All the struggles and ups and downs our family has been through lately are not the end. God has more in store for us and He wants me to keep clinging to Him alone!!”
In answer I want to tell the Riggs family, and MckMamma’s family, that even if your trial lasts way longer than you can imagine enduring… that same God is still going to be there.
He is going to give you new mercy for each day that you are in that fire.
He is going to give you strength over and over and over again when you just can’t do it any more.
He is going to bring peace and joy into your life when peace and joy shouldn’t be there.
He is going to carry you when you cannot move yourself.
Unfortunately, the enemy of our souls is still there also, trying to cast doubt over every moment that goes by.
And I would say again today…
“Jesus replied, ‘What is impossible with men is possible with God.’" –Luke 18:27
Pam
8 comments:
I love your honesty. It's so hard to understand how God can let some things happen. That's why I can't call myself "blessed" anymore, because that would mean that people who are struggling with terrible things are "unblessed". I don't believe that. I don't know why bad things happen to some and not others, but I don't believe it's God's will. I do believe he's there however to help us through. I hope the clouds lift for you soon.
I read that too. Yes, He will continue to refine us until we are more pure, more perfect, more holy like Him.
Just think...if He loves us that much to create something new in us...If He just cannot leave us alone...He much love us.
"My child, I love you so much, that I cannot love you more."
Im so sorry you feel so down lately. I hope you find peace and contentment today. Alot of things in life arent fair, and alot of things in this life HURT, espeically when it continues. God knows your heart, your situation, and all the while... He holds you close in the palm of His hand. It is hard to trust and know if any good will ever exist, but beleive me, I see so much good in your family. You have a strong heart, a heart to follow God no matter what. Your kids seem to be doing so well... I love their beautiful simles.
I hate to admit, but I have been wondering since the posting of your sister's engagement and noticing you feeling down sometime afterwards... does it affect you, make you long all the more to be married? I just thought Id ask, since you mentioned you dont really know why you are feeling so down? Please dont let this pull you down, Im not trying to do that. I think you are one AMAZING woman, and I know God will conitnue to bless you as you remain his faithful servant! Thank you for being the example you are, even when it is tough and gets old. Life is so unfair, but God is so Good!!
Storming Heaven's doors for you today, so your burden will be lifted and the joy you long to feel will be given to you in exchange.
Pam,
Wow. Thank you for sending me over here, Pam. You know, I read a bunch of your story quite a while ago...whenever it was you first commented on my blog, perhaps...when I was in the hospital?
Anyway, it is encouraging to read what you write...and also scary. I feel as if I know God is carrying me now, but I still have, as a human, an end in sight...of when I WANT this to all be over...when I know I WON'T be able to go on. Yet, all this has lasted MUCH longer than I even thought I could endure, and so I know that HE will still be there, for as long as He allows my trials to continue.
I am so sorry your road has been so long, too....much longer than mine....and am SO blessed to see you still clinging to Him the best you can, too, and letting Him carry you after that point.
Warmly,
MckMama
Love ya lots, think of you often and send up a prayer.
thanks for the reminder of God can do all things.
Love ya,
Hol
Anonymous,
thanks for your comment and your concern. I am doing amazingly well, better than I ever dreamed, with my sister and her engagement. No, this is not the issue, the issue i deal with is waiting on God to do something, and the warfare that goes along with it. When HSSH does things it stirs up all the emotions and makes things hard all over again. I don't share all the behind the sceen things that happen with HSSH on the blog.
Thanks again for your prayers, concern, and comment!
beautiful beautiful post.. thank you for sharing it.
Beautiful post. So much truth about God's faithfulness to us. However, your second to last line stuck out at me:
"Unfortunately, the enemy of our souls is still there also, trying to cast doubt over every moment that goes by."
He is the one always there to try to sneak into our thoughts casting doubt eithe on ourselves or on our God and what He is doing.
His day is coming. Yes ma'am, it is!
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